Frenemies suck

There are some people I can never get over in my life. I’m not talking about the love of my life (because I still have him). I’m talking about frenemies. Those people who pretended to be your friend and then when your back is turned you get stabbed, repeatedly.

We all have one (or unfortunately more than one) of these people in our lives at some point. If we say we don’t, then we are good at forgetting or maybe just don’t want to be reminded. I have several. Those who know me well know that if I hadn’t transferred schools my Senior year of high school my life would be very different than it is now. It would probably not be for the best. I was headed in a direction that could have become a disaster. 

Some of these frenemies may have helped me go that direction. Some of these frenemies may have pushed me into this direction. I will take a lot of responsibility for allowing it to happen, but let’s be honest pre-teens and teens can be mean and can change their attitudes quicker than they change their boyfriends. 

The worse of the frenemies were “there for you” when things were bad. They helped pick up the pieces when tricks were played on you by guys who wanted to be your boyfriend, only to have their best guy friend call two days later to break up with you. They were “sad” when you moved away. These same people who told people that you moved away because you a) got pregnant and were SENT away b) were in rehab c) had to get away because they couldn’t deal with it and dropped out of school. They also told people that you spread rumors about other friends. You wonder why they stopped calling or trying to hang out, only to find out years later about these rumors.

I’ve tried to forgive these people, and was able to forget about it. I knew that they were out of my life for good and I could just move on with my life… then it happens… You run into this person while out with friends and it all comes back. You keep your distance. You try to not interact. You put on your face and play nice. Deep down you wonder when the bottom is going to fall out. You wonder if you will ever feel like you are going to be out of high school even though you are in your mid 30s. 

I wonder what will happen when we actually move far away (as in another state). I wonder if people who I’m great friends with will forget me or if these people will fill their heads full of lies and I have to just pick up again and make new friends who will NEVER meet these frenemies.

How did that super new moon work out?

After my last blog entry, you would assume I was optimistic and ready to take on 2014. I was. It was short lived.

 

2014 thus far has been a shit-storm. How I’ve been dealing with it has not be productive. I’m unmotivated and tired.

 

I want to be motivated. I want to be happy. I want to deal with things differently. Somehow I haven’t found how to make that change.

 

I’m having difficulty getting the motivation to get the last 20-30 pounds off that I need to lose. I keep losing and regaining the same 10 pounds.

 

I don’t know how to get out of this terrible funk. Hopefully this will pass!

New Super Moon for 2014. What does it mean?

A customer mentioned to me toward the end of 2013 that a New Moon would bring in 2014. It was meant to flush out all the negativity that 2013 brought us. I decided to start doing research. With it I started thinking about 2013.

I had intended with 2013 to blog or post a status update about what wonderful things happened. Admittedly, I didn’t get very far with that .New Year’s resolutions don’t usually stick. If they do they might stick for a few months and then we get back into our bad habits. One of mine is admittedly bitching. I may not have been direct affected, but it seems like there was a lot of horrific and sad things that happened in 2013. When I think back about how “bad” 2013 was, I honestly was very lucky. I was actually blessed.

I had some things irritating happen, but I’m still alive. I did not break my tailbone in 2013. I did not have a car accident. I was not hospitalized. Ernie is overall healthy.

We DID have tough decisions to make this year. We have had some issues with the house. Don’t forget the damn ice storm and loss of power (ours was not as bad as others).

I honestly, think that 2013 was a wash for me personally. It could have been worse, but it also could have been better.

So what does this New Moon, which is also a “Super Moon” really mean for 2014?

When I was done feeling sorry for myself, and then realizing that it could have been worse, I started researching how this New Super Moon really means.

This New Moon, literally means out with the old and in with the new. As my customer put it, it flushes out 2013 and brings us a whole new life. That sounds nice and all. I wanted to know what that really meant. I found tons of info, but not a lot of it made any sense.

Even if you put zero stock in moon cycles or astrology there are things to think about. To make 2014 better for you as a whole you have to make changes and different choices. The New Moon on New Year’s Day is supposed to make that easier. You still have to make the change and commit to the change. We can’t expect that just because a New Super Moon fell on New Year’s Day that the world will do all the work for us. All the research I did pointed to the fact that this just provides the right timing to make changes but it is all up to us.

As we reflect on 2013, maybe we should not just focus on tragedy, but how we deal with it. Tragedy will always be there, that will not change. Death is part of life. It sucks. It isn’t easy. Obstacles are part of life. Life isn’t easy. Bad things happen. That isn’t going to change. How we deal with tough situations is what needs to change. How we react to situations needs to change. How we turn those situations around needs to change.

I’m not suggesting that we can’t grieve when life throws us a big pile of shit at us. It will happen. We just need to change what we do and how we pick up the pieces.

New Moon or not, 2014 is going to be what we make of it. If you commit to yourself that it will be better it will be. You have to follow through and make a plan. Wishing it to be better won’t make it better. Action will. The New Moon may just give us that extra gumption to do something about it.